UPDATES...again.

WELL, Andrew is still in the hospital!!

He had a cortisone shot epidural and it didn't touch the pain. So, the herniated disc is not causing the pelvic pain.  He is being discharged today. They are having him go right to the primary doctor across the street so he can get that doctor up to speed, and so he will be able to prescribe pain medicine and we can "manage the pain at home".  Also, the pcp will be the dr to refer us for 2nd opinions.  I hate to be negative, but the pain meds they are giving him for home are not like what he has been getting in the hospital, so I'm not optimistic that we will be able to manage much at home.  The hospital is saying studies show managing pain at home is better for patients.  I told the hospitalist that I know we will just be in another hospital soon. He said his recommendation is to keep him out of the hospital because he just gets frustrated there. REally? You dont think he will be frustrated at home?
He is currently at Concord Hospital. I didnt write the name before out of our privacy, but at this point, I  want people to know. The doctors prefer text book cases and Andrew is not text book, so they are just throwing their arms up.  I believe the hospitalist still thinks it a urology issue, but the urologists in Concord have washed their hands of if. 
Yesterday they talked about having a psych evaluation but I dont think that ever happened. They also stopped his pain meds and only gave him Tylenol and he ended up in tears. YES, my grown ass husband- who I have almost never seen cry.  THIS hurts my heart.
I guess I will see what the primary is willing to do.  IF he wont refer him right away, then I might just bring him in through the ER at either Dartmouth or B.I in Boston.  I am getting all his records today so I will have those on hand.

This was one of the days we went to visit dada.
By the way, I have been so caught up in Andrew that I forgot to tell you that Anika has been calling me Mum Mum. She also loves to say Uh oh. She drops things all the time and says "Uh Oh"  She also points and says dada when we walk by the hall of photos at our house. There are pictures of Andrew but also I think it is because he always stops and shows her all the pictures and points to who people are. She went to a parent teacher conference with Miss B the other day (For Miss B's son) and she sat in Miss b's lap eating her blueberries and when she dropped the cover she said "Uh oh" and miss b said she was showing off putting on quite a show.
She has been Such a sweetie pie lately. Just melts my cold heart. hahaha 

These are all Iphone photos. Oh yes, I jumped over to the dark side. My blackberry was shitting the bed and it needed to be restarted SEVERAL times a day.  When I went to verizon to look at my options, an Iphone came up and I could get it for $100 so I just got it. I still cant really use it and I hate the touch pad still. I miss a keyboard.  Also it is different with emails and how that all works.  People say I will love it soon.  We had to wait FOREVER at Verizon as well.  Anika just ran around the store and I just followed her around.  I also brought a book and kept reading that.  There was another Little boy there (2 years old) and his mother kept yelling his first and middle name and yelling at him. Like "Brandon Michal- GET OVER here NOW!"  I was so happy that I had the patience to deal with Anika in JUST the way I wanted to.  In fact, I even told Andrew when we got to the hospital that I used to look at some parents and think "WOW, that is exactly the calm, soft spoken mom I want to be" and voila. That was totally me that day.

I was so proud of it because I really try to do positive discipline with Anika. So, when she was just playing at the store well, I kept telling her and kissing her and saying "Anika, you are such a good girl. I really appreciate how patient you are being. I am so proud of you"  AND, having books and toys there in my purse was KEY!
Lets fast forward a few days. I had to go BACK to Verizon because they gave me the "courtesy" option to put the iphone and accessories all on my next bill instead of paying then. I said sure. Then I got my bill and the surcharges and fees were up by FORTY percent. So I assumed that they taxed the additional costs of the phone and such.   There is NO sales tax in NH by the way, so I never pay tax on goods. Come to find out- they didn't. THe government mandates the surcharge fees and they did go up! But it went up by a lot for me also because We had $80 in overage charges! We NEVER go over.  I tried disputing the whole thing and I got no where.  We had to wait for 40 minutes on Sunday in the store and this time Anika had 2 Tantrums. Back arching and screaming when I took the boxes away she picked up off the shelves. I gave her my box and I tried reading to her. it worked a few times but she was done.   Finally, someone called my name to help me at customer service and Anika was over it.  A Stranger came over and said "Hi, do you want me to read to her or walk around with her while you talk to customer service?" I looked at her and she looked like a girl from one of my mom groups, but she wasn't and I knew that.  She seemed nice. At this point I had given Anika my wallet to shut her up and she was pulling all the cards and check book out. I didn't even care because it was keeping her quiet.  I remember very distinctly a few years ago being at my friend's house and the contents of her wallet were all over the floor. I was horrified. She told me her son did it. I was like- oh hell no. I'm too anal. I would be pissed if my kid disorganized my wallet and I wouldn't let it happen.  OH yes, foot in mouth. Granted I would NEVER allow her do it at home but in a public crowded store to keep her still and quiet, I sure did.  The stranger was trying to help....and I eventually just handed her a screaming Anika and turned around and went back to talking to customer service. I was also returning a car charger because I thought they charged too much for it. lol.  When I was all done and got nowhere, I turned around looking for Anika. OH SHIT. WHERE WAS SHE?  The stranger's boyfriend looked at me and said "They are over looking at the Ipads" And i said oh, phew, I thought she took her and the boyfriend said laughing "Oh no, I wouldn't let that happen" haha.

ANika just needed some entertainment and I thanked the girl so much. I still cant believe I did that. Haha.  AND, there was a very made up heavily perfumed older lady who had come over to help before that.  I mean, ANika wasn't being loud- she just wouldn't sit still. ANd, I bet it was all over me that I was a mess. Driving back and forth to the hospital every day, caring for an active little girl, and trying to keep my life together...it puts a toll on me.  I stress a lot about money and Andrew not being able to work.  LET ME SAY, THANK GOD for savings.  THIS is one of those times, Im SOOo happy Andrew doesn't like to spend money.  I mean, its not taking a huge hit yet, but I think it will if he continues to be the way he is.   And the medical bills- I cant even think about those right now.

So, ANika- THis is the problem with a young walker- they don't understand consequences...or bribes yet.   I left that store sweaty and near tears because of getting no where with Verizon and then about to head to the hospital.

This is just a picture I took out my sky light bedroom window of the full moon. haha. IT doesn't really make sense in this post.

Kale chips I love to make with coconut oil. SO healthy and delicious. Coconut oil is SOO healthy and has so many wonderful purposes.  AND making kale chips is super easy. I dont even take off the stems.

Anika visiting dada

 She loves to escape his room and run down the halls. Luckily he is in the orthopedic section so people are not sick. Also that floor is really quite empty! She just does laps around the wing.  I have to let her to burn energy. Luckily she doesn't touch too much.

My friends went and visited Andrew last Friday. They brought him that big balloon that says "I love you" ...I wonder what the nurses thought when I got there as the wife! lol. My friend K and C (and C brought her 14 week old son) all visited ANdrew for 3 hours. ANd brought him TONS of goodies. When I got there Friday night, his spirits were SOO high.  He even told me he had no idea that visitors could distract him from his pain so much.  It was so nice to see him happy. Also on Friday we THOUGHT we had some answers, but come to find out- we dont.

Saturday, I had a ski race. I almost had to miss another one, but my parents finally got back and my dad rode up to the mountain (1.5 hours north) with me and my friend I race with. We took Andrew's truck.   My dad cant watch Anika alone at the house, but said he would watch her while I took my runs. He is a wonderful grandfather and loves to be around Anika,  but he has probably never changed a diaper in his life.  He does more with kids when they get older, but he loves to have Anika with him...as long as my mom or me are around to help! haha  My mom had a race with my niece at another mountain so she couldn't watch Anika.  I brought the sled for him to pull her around.

He said people kept stopping them to talk to Anika. When I got ready to head out, my dad said "What if she poops? If she poops, Im calling 911"

LOL. Luckily she didn't poop....and he probably wouldn't have even known if she did!

She was admiring her Mum Mum who got FIRST Place!

It was nice to race and let some of my frustrations out. We only stayed for my run and were back home by noon. Anika and I went to the dump and did some laundry and then went down to see Dada.

And, I'm off to pick Andrew up. I Just got off the phone with the hospital social services!
This is such a friggen mess and so upsetting.
Ill keep you posted.

WHAT a way to spend Valentine's Day, huh?

My 10 Month old Ski Racer!

MISS ANIKA,  I CANT Believe my bub is 10 Months old!
You have been one busy little girl.

You were walking a little on your 9 month birthday, but now you are running! 

AND...as of this Sunday- SKIING! haha. Kind of.

ON Sunday, we went over to our local Mt for a fun race sponsored by Mt. D*w.  I have participated in this race MANY MANY times  in the last 20 years. The race has been going on for 21 years.  The race crew said you are officially the youngest competitor they have ever had in 21 years :)   You were just going to watch me race...but, then after my run, we decided to borrow some boots and skis and let you try. Nona hiked up the trail with you in the Ergo. I carried the skis and boots up the chairlift with me.

The boots were a little big, so you had your regular shoes on as well inside the boots! haha

We are in the start gate to the right...You were smiling for the crew taking pics.

"Racer Ready. 3, 2, 1...GO!"
Mummy's legs were BURNING when I had to bend down and help you go the whole way.  IT was a perma squat.  I work my legs a lot too, and this HURT! When we were near daddy (3 or 4 gates from the bottom) I just had to stand up to give my legs a break. When I stood up, I also picked you up and the weight of the skis on your legs must have hurt because you started to whimper, but then before I put you back down, ONE ski fell off! LOL. It went down the course and through the finish and You finished on ONE SKI! :)

As you can see, this was a very easy course. I went very slow ;)

After your run, we went in the lodge to warm up. YOu were happy. This snow suit was Mummy's when I was your age ;) 

We went back out to watch Nona and your cousins race too.

Later in the day, we waited for the award ceremony.

YOU GOT A GOLD MEDAL! ANd, when they called you up, I let you walk up there and get your medal. YOu were ALL smiles- NOT SHY at all! The race crew guys were giving you high five and just loved you and you loved them.  SO, sure you were the only girl in your age group and that is why you got gold!  They also gave you an awesome chair and a sweatshirt.  AND you qualified for the finals that will take place at Mt. Snow in March! Free ticket for us. You really do just go TO ANYONE!  SO friendly ...but a little touchy and other kids don't really like that. haha

Eating your Gold with Nona.  Gold Anika- We like gold :)

AND, MUMMY GOT GOLD for her AGE group as well. I ALSO got best female time of the day :)  I get to go to the finals too.  Too bad I cant get 1st in my other leagues!

Mummy and you- The Gold Girls :)

Cousin K got bronze for her age :) 

So proud of you girls.

I tried to take some photos this morning, but you wanted to take your sticker off and when I wouldn't let you, you just cried. haha

Tonight, we tried again with daddy. I was blowing your belly and daddy got this pic. Daddy doesn't like ANY nakey or remotely nakey pics of you on line...so I just added these circles! lol. BUT, they make it look even worse...but too funny not to post :)

But then I just made this one ...

And, these pictures were hard to get too...Just picked up lenny the lion

Taking that sticker off!

hhaha. It looks like I'm scolding you, but I really wasn't. I'm not sure what was going on but its funny looking.  We generally don't even scold you but try to use positive discipline with you AND redirection works AMAZING!

Well, Miss Anika...you are a JOY to be around.  In the past week, you have started to actually LOOK where you are walking so you walk OVER things instead of just tripping over them. I have seen you step over things and look where you are going :)  You are saying dog, dada, doll, (dada says you say duck)...nona said you said better.  I have heard you say hi and down.  But, one word NO ONE has heard you say is ANYTHING sounding like MAMA!   You wont use a sippy cup and I have tried A LOT of them. I don't know if you cant figure it out or you just don't like them?   You get into EVERYTHING you can.  You love to explore around our house.  You really are such a sweetie and you light up any room. 

You have ZERO interest in TV. I didn't want you watching TV before you were 2, but I have tried a few PBS shows and even the Baby Sign language DVD- and NOPE! You have better things to do than sit in front of the TV!  WILL not do it.  I guess that's ok ;) 
You are still going on the potty when we are home. You eat all of your food by yourself when you are with me.  You love brown rice and chicken that I make. You ate 2 cups of it on Sunday. Chow hound!

You love the spice drawer. It used to be alphabetised.  ITS NOT anymore!! I find spices ALL over the house now.  I taped you getting into the drawer this month....

SKI races and stuff

 I am back to skiing. I had to take last winter off since I was pregnant with Anika. TOO Pregnant to ski. If I was in early pregnancy, I definitely would have skied.... but probably not raced.   LAST Saturday was my first race of the season. It was also my first time on skis since the winter before last :)  My friend Nicki decided to race again this year.   Andrew, Anika, Nicki and myself all drove up to Bretton Woods.  After I fed and changed Anika, Nicki and I went out to check out the course. We took  2 free runs to get a feel for the snow and skis.  Anika stayed in the lodge with daddy. It was her nap time by then so he put her in the hiking back pack and walked around outside so she could sleep.  

Nicki's friend met us there so he was able to take the picture AND be our coat carriers. In the past, Andrew has carried our coats down while we race.   I was still placed in the highest division for the league....I figured I would have been bumped down after missing a season. There are different classes for different levels of racers.   I was VERY nervous at the top of the course. Like stomach turning nervous. I was wimpy.  I was thinking, Oh great- motherhood made me wimpy!

BUT, once I started the course (and it was an easy course by the way), I felt ok. MY form was a mess, but I ended up coming in 2nd for my division and 2nd out of ALL female racers. I beat a male on my team I ski with...the last season I raced, he beat me twice and I beat him twice. We have a friendly competition, but  HE was not happy about me beating him my first day back. ANika was sleeping during my run but woke up soon after. Anyway, I like to come in 1st, but for being my first time on snow in 2 years...I guess Ill take it. The 1st place girl beat me by 7/10ths of a second, which is a lot in racing, but not So much I cant beat her another day. Basically, I have competition, but beatable competition :)

 After my run...they took my bib right away. I borrowed this race suit for the day, but It was too big in my back. My old suit had its last day 2 years ago.

Nicki.

I put the back pack on after this and skied on the flat area...which was about 40 feet to the lodge. YOu should have seen the looks I got. Like People thought I was skiing the whole mt with her on my back. Ha. Although, I heard in "the old days" people used to do that.  We went in the lodge to eat and then Andrew went out snowboarding for a while with Nicki and her friend while I sat in the lodge with Anika. Actually, we didn't do a lot of sitting because she was walking all over. I was just happy that we were stuck in a ski lodge with a walker and not a crawler. A crawler would have been HORRIBLE. Her hands all over the dirty ground- yuck. Maybe next race she can go to my mom so Andrew and I can ski together, but then again- Its hard for me to leave her for the whole days on weekends since its our only days with her.  I kind of want to find a sitter to come skiing with us. That way, I can still nurse her and hang out when I come in the lodge.

Anika ended up only having a 15 minute nap in the back pack and then only slept 15 minutes on our hour car ride home...with a detour at a bar. I sat in the car with her while the others went in to have a drink. Then, we went in to tell them we were ready to go :)  So...Ya...it was a 30 minute nap day!  I don't know how she does it. She went to bed a tiny bit early that night.

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Sunday, Anika and I met Anna and we drove 2 hours south for a baby shower.

Anika getting her finger prints all over the glass table. She was Non stop at this event as well. She was the only kid there (she was invited) so she got LOTS of attention and I had LOTS of helpers to watch her, which was nice.  It was the first time I met the owner of the home.  She is My friend's business partner. She has 2 kids of her own and when I put Anika down to walk, she said "Wow, she walks? I have heard about kids walking at 9 months but I assumed people were lying and I thought it was just a myth. What a freak of nature"  (paraphrased) This bring me to another topic. A lot of moms have made this comment lately about how other moms must lie about what their kids do. Like, that moms lie about their kids sleeping through the night, etc.  I don't get it. Why?  I just assume my friends tell me the truth, and vice versa!  There was a time Anika slept through the night...But, now...she doesn't. I didn't lie about it then and I don't now. She wakes up a few times a night these days. Another mom at the shower had a baby a month younger than Anika and was shocked that Anika ate all her food by herself with her own two hands. (SHe had a plate of fruit at the shower).  Maybe I can credit that to baby led weaning.  She has ate her own solids for a long time because I have always given her that opportunity.  Speaking of that- Anika has great hand eye coordination and does a lot of amazing things with her hands...BUT- one of them is NOT clapping! I have been showing her how to clap since she was born...and she just.will. not do it. She just laughs at me. IT is almost like she is saying EFF you to me because its something I am trying to teach her. She would rather do stuff I don't teach her.  Just like she says Dada, dog, doll, better, down...but NOT MAMA or mum.  I have been saying the word mama longer than any other word. I have said it to her since birth but no. She has no interest in saying THAT word. 

Anyway, I was talking about opportunities.  I also give her the opportunity to sit on her potty whenever I go to the bathroom at home. She has to come with me most times anyway (So she doesn't get into stuff while I'm gone) so...she sits on hers while I sit on mine. She almost always goes when I put her on it. There is NO pressure as I have said. I AM JUST giving her the opportunity when I go. She acts pretty happy to be  on it, so its definitely something she seems ok with. She loves to watch her waste get flushed! ha. Ew. speaking of which, I JUST barely caught her before she was playing in an over flowing toilet in Andrew's bathroom today! I walked down the hall JUST in the nick of time-she was about to get in it, I know! I yelled for Andrew to come clean up his mess and took her away. Maybe if he didn't LINE THe ENTIRE TOILET bowl with toilet paper, it wouldn't overflow.  He said he doesn't want water to splash him when he goes. WHAT.A.BABY.  Anyway, giving Anika the opportunity to go on the potty actually has a name- Elimination communication. I put Anika on the potty to poop WAY before I knew EC even existed though. One of my readers pointed out that it had an actual term!  I used to just put her on because it was obvious when she was pooping and I didn't want to clean a poopy diaper.  EC is not potty training though

.

Anna and Anika.

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ON the same day as my race last Saturday, we ran into someone who needed females for a corporate ski team that races on Thursday nights at a Mt. about half hour away from where I live.  I declined because I have Anika. I mentioned it to my mom a few days later,  and she said she would pick A up from Miss B and bring her to the Mt on Thursday nights. That way, I could feed her, hang out AND do the racing.  My mom said she really wants to see me race since she hasn't in years. Plus, Anika can watch me too! The Thursday night league is a little different. We do two runs on the course and we don't have to go in bib order. Just go do our 2 runs anytime we want between 5:30pm and 8 Pm.   At first I thought it was only 4 or 5 weeks, but it is actually 8, but IM doing it!

This past Thursday night Andrew ended up being home. I left work early due to BAD Roads and bad weather.  (Andrew took my car to get snow tires the next day and now its a super star in the snow).  My friend Nicki picked me up at home and we went to the Mountain.   We don't really know anyone on the other league (yet). It was cold out, so we took one free run, then our 2 race runs and left. When we were getting our bibs, I saw two girls that looked like real racers and I was intimidated.  I came in 4th that night. 1st place beat me by almost 2 whole seconds. That is A LOT.  It will take a LOT on my part to beat her this season, but I NEED to place at least top 3! So, I will be trying hard. I am still getting VERY nervous before each run. Just being at the top of the course gets my heart racing. I dont like that feeling in this old age, but once Im in the course, I feel better.

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 Anika getting pulled on her sled.

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THIS Saturday, I got 6 inches of my hair cut off! I told Andrew it was a foot, but he said he didn't think that was accurate.  IT is way shorter which I am sad about, BUT its so much healthier looking, which I am HAPPY about.  I found a local farmer's market and stopped by on Saturday. I cant wait to go next week- earlier and with Andrew and Anika.  It is new and every Saturday.   I stopped by Kohls to get some leggings and didn't look at the price of the ones I got...then when I got to the register and they said $36 I was like- WHHAAAT? NO. I went and returned right away. Went to walmart instead. I was rushing around the whole time because I was trying to get home to feed Anika! She was home with dada. 

 I like leggings that are high waisted not low rise. Anyone have a favorite brand of leggings that are not almost $40?

Sunday (Today) I picked up a special cake for the neighbors who called about our chimney fire.  Then I went to brunch with just the girls.

 Andrew was pretty bummed because he loves this brunch place....but we can go next Sunday...or any other time :)  This was a no boys/ no kids brunch. When I got home, we went to the neighbors to drop of  the thank you note and cake, but they weren't there. We left it on their porch! IT was 5 degrees here today. I hope they got the cake because it was not a cheap one!   THEN, Andrew, ANika and I drove an hour for me to look at a GS/Race suit someone was selling second hand.  They are $500 brand new. My old one pretty much disintegrated.  I got this one barely used for $80...but its TIGHT. REAL tight.  They are supposed to be tight...but whoa.   I am not feeling secure in it... I told ANdrew it will fit better next year when I am skinnier and he said I better wear it this year after all that. ha

This is what I wore to brunch :)  When Nicki saw me she said REAL Hippies do not wear fur.  :)

I have tomorrow off :)  I need to take 2 classes at the gym, then home to spend the day with my Little Gal. This weekend was the most I went out without her...ever, I think! It was weird. I missed her lots while out, especially grocery shopping without her. I hated that.  I missed my little buddy, but I was in that town after my hair cut, so it would be silly not to go while I was over that way.  Luckily, she LOVES spending time with her daddy.

Hope you had a great weekend my friends.